Save Your Marriage

Men aren't supposed to like romance, right? Well, that's the theory, anyway.

In practice, men may not always like to call it romance, but we feel the same yearning to connect that you do, to give and receive physical expressions of love and to continue the rituals of courtship. In short, we want to romance you... and we secretly want you to romance us.

The flowery stuff, the roses, and candlelight, just isn't a guy thing. So skip the sweet little trappings and go for what's guaranteed to work.

#1. Dress Up for Him

"Consider dressing for his tastes and not just yours once in a while," says Barbara De Angelis, Ph.D., author of "Secrets About Men Every Woman Should Know." "Take him shopping and have him choose outfits he would like to see you in."Remember, you're doing this for him, not for you.

And, as psychologist Ronald Goldstein, Ph.D., a marriage counselor in Newtown, Pennsylvania, explains: "Women should keep in mind that men are visually oriented." Trust me, men find it very romantic when you step wholeheartedly into our debauched little fantasy worlds. If we're hard-wired to be turned on by visual cues, why not indulge us -- and use it to your advantage?

#2. Initiate Physical Affection

Whether you're playing footsie under the table or placing a hand on our shoulders while scooting behind our chairs, men find the touch of the woman they love unbelievably reassuring. In our treasured nonverbal language, it translates as: "I accept you... I love you... We're a team."

#3. Give Him a Night Out with the Boys -- No Strings Attached

It may seem odd to you that a romantic gesture might not involve you at all. But dogs run with dogs, wolves run with wolves, and every so often, guys just have to break away and run with the guys (drooling and howling optional).

#4. Tell Him What a Big, Strong Guy He Is

We men are famously incompetent at expressing ourselves verbally... but that doesn't mean we don't appreciate hearing a little praise now and then. In particular, we draw a lot of our identity from our maleness. Nurturing our big-ape fantasies -- me Tarzan, you Jane -- lets us know you value us as males, which is somehow important to the continued production of testosterone.

A quick insight into men: We all want to be heroes. Remembering to compliment your mate on being a great partner isn't always easy in the middle of a busy day, but it's a quick shortcut to making him feel wanted, needed, and loved, which is of course the ultimate point of any romantic gesture. And this positive reinforcement of your mate's good behavior will yield big dividends later, as he subconsciously tries to live up to your glowing appraisal.

#5. Score Him a Pair of Tickets to the Big Game

Which would you rather receive from your mate: a weekend at a spa or a new set of cookware? The spa is by far the more romantic gift, if only because he doesn't stand to gain anything from it. Gifts that don't benefit the giver are somehow purer because they demonstrate you care only about making your partner happy. So when you're thinking about gifts, try not to think about what you'd like to get him, but what he'd like to receive.

#6. Show Interest in His Outside Life

We live in a fast-paced world, and we all know it's easy enough to get wrapped up in our own routines. But finding ways to let a man know you care about all aspects of his life, not just the parts he shares with you, is a great way to show you love the whole man.

Shoot him a few well-directed questions about work to help him unwind, surprise him with a book relating to a hobby, track down a website that deals with some problem he's having -- all are touching gestures I guarantee will be well received.

#7. Tell Him a Secret

Men want to be soul mates, too. Telling him a secret -- symbolically letting him deeper inside you -- demonstrates total trust in him and faith in your relationship. Because you're making yourself vulnerable, it's an incredible bonding experience. What works just as well: Encourage him to tell you a secret or two. And don't laugh.

By Redbookmag.com

Labels: Barbara De Angelis, men, romance, Ronald Goldstein, save your marriage

Marriage is an intimate relationship of two people which keeps them connected together. Starting and breaking up the marital relationship is quite easy, but it is difficult to keep the relationships alive and keep the marriage intact. When you feel that your marriage is in danger, you should take the efforts to save your marriage.

However, it is not a one-way traffic; both the partners should equally strive to maintain the healthy relationships. As separation or divorce can affect personal, economical and social stability, both the partners equally need to improve themselves and save the marriage. Today, you will find numerous men trying to save their marriage.

Regardless of age and gender, today everybody is realizing the importance of marriage and trying to save it if it is in trouble. Men trying to save their marriage can be successful in their mission by adopting good qualities and avoiding some things. True love for your partner is a strong base for a successful married life. Every woman expects that her husband should be caring and romantic.

She will be pleased if her husband expresses his passion for his wife by offering her surprise gifts, writing romantic poems, going to see the romantic movies with her or taking her for surprise lunch or dinner.

Men trying to save their marriage should always remember that good communication between husband and wife is very necessary to maintain the healthy relationships. For that, the husband should keep aside some time from his busy schedule to spend it with his wife. He should be able to listen to and understand the feelings and problems of his wife. If both feel that their marital relationships are getting boring, then the husband may take an initiative and plan for outing to spend the long-term vacations.

Trust and faith is a basic factor of married life and faithlessness can create the problems in married life. Hence, men trying to save their marriage should follow the commitment towards their partners and try not to give a chance for misunderstandings. Even if the husband has an extra-marital affair, he should apologize and promise to stop the affair.

Living with an abusing partner is a very stressful and embarrassing situation for every individual. Physical, emotional or economical abuse can affect the physiological and physical status of a person and the effects may be longer-lasting. Husband's abusive behavior can cause conflicts and bitterness due to which your marriage may be in trouble.

Hence, he should avoid the things that hurt his wife. The husband should completely trust his wife and never feel jealous about her personal and professional progress.

If the man finds it difficult to solve the problems in his married life at his level, then he may talk with his family or friends and get some solutions from them. He can seek the marriage counseling which may help to understand the problems and differences between the couple and help them to find out the solutions. He can also go for a trial separation.

Men trying to save their marriage can be successful to improve the marital relationships with patient efforts.

Browse Save Your Marriage

Labels: men, relationship, save marriage, save your marriage

Once a man has scorned you, you may find that it is hard to trust anyone again especially another man. This can be live changing experience and you may need help trying to figure out what you can do to get over this relationship and what has happened to you. There are so many reasons why a woman can loose trust in her partner and it may be hard to get those feelings of trust back. In fact, for some women and relationships, the trust is lost forever.

Why do men lie?

There are different reasons why men lie. There are some men that do nothing but lie all the time and then there are men that never tell an untruth about anything. It will depend the personality of the man and how they grew up.

Sometimes how a person was raised can be the determining factor about how a man acts when he is an adult. If they are raised around men that lie all the time and are not very respectful to women, they may grow up to be the same way. This is not something that is necessarily going to happen, but it can be a cause.

There are many men that lie because they are ashamed of whom they are. They may not tell a woman the truth because they are not excited about anything in their life. They may feel ashamed of who they are and what they do for living or even where they come from. Sometimes a man will lie to make they look better in the eyes of a woman. Little do they know that this will only make a women less attracted to them because of the lies they tell?

Another reason why men lie is to cheat. There are so many relationships ruined because a man has cheated. Once a man cheats on a woman, the woman will have a hard time ever really trusting the man again. They may find it difficult to maintain a good relationship with anyone ever again. This can be a devastating blow to any woman that has low self-esteem already.

How to tell when a man is lying

When a man is lying to their partner, some can determine it right away. Some women can tell just by the way the man is acting. Some men cannot look them in the eye, get nervous and act suspicious, and may even stutter or fumble their words. However there are some men that can lay so well that no one will ever be able to tell.

It is important for women to try and recognize the signs of a man lying to her so that they can tell when they are being fooled or not. This is something that will take a little bit of knowledge and a lot of patience. If a woman is being lied to, they should not stand for it. They need to take control of their own life and remove themselves from this type of unnatural relationship.

What can I do to rebuild the bond and trust?

Many women will not give up on the man that she loves. She may find that this is the person that they want to spend the rest of their life with. When this happens, they will try and do anything they can to make the relationship a success again.

For some of these relationships it is possible to do. However there are some that will never be repaired. Sometimes a woman can just tell when there is no hope for their relationship and they will have to learn to accept the fact that their man is a liar and there is no hope.

However for some, there is hope and this is a long and difficult process.

There may be time when a woman just wants to give up and leave the situation, but then she realizes that she wants to try a build the bond again. When this is the case, there needs to be a lot of communication. For some couples, counseling is necessary to get the relationship back on track.

It is important to talk the situation out and lay down ground rules.

This is a very important step that has to be taken so that the couple can figure out where they stand in the relationship. Laying down ground rules is important to. This is where the woman needs to feel like she is in control and that she has all the cards in her hand. If a man is serious about being with you, they will do whatever is necessary to gain your trust again.

Should you trust someone with a history of infidelity?

If you are thinking about having, a relationship with someone that has be unfaithful before, you may have a tough road ahead of you. This will be something that will take a little bit of time and work. You will want to be a little leery in the beginning. You do not want to go too fast incase the man tries to repeat history. You can trust someone until they give you reason not too, however you need to be cautious so that you are not putting yourself in a vulnerable position.

Can you change a man? Is it possible for them to not lie again?

For some men, you can change the way they behave. You can do your very best to make them see what a good thing they have with you and that any little mess up can take it all away. You will want to make them understand that you are in control and that you are making the rules. They will have to follow them and change their lying and cheating ways or the relationship will have no merit.

Men can change and there is no reason to give up on them right away. If you think the relationship is worth saving, you can take the appropriate steps to make sure that you are both happy without the risk of ever having to deal with this problem again.

By Cucan Pemo

Labels: how, know, lie, lying, man, men, save your marriage, tell, trust